The room may spin. Maybe your palms are a little sweaty.
And maybe your breath is even shallow, quicker…
Your body's sending signals that it's nervous, perhaps even panicky.
It might almost feel like something's bearing down on you.
And that something?
It's your to-do list.
Welcome to Overwhelm.
Hey, we've all been there. (And if we're being really honest, we're probably all going to be there again at some point. It happens to even the most organized and productive of us from time to time!)
What's important isn't avoiding it altogether. You're human. And you're running a business. It happens!
What's important is recognizing it, and knowing what to do when it hits… and, just as importantly, what NOT to do.
Here's your quickie rundown. (You may want to print it out and keep nearby… for the next time the room starts spinning!)
The 5 WORST Things To Do When You're Overwhelmed
Overwhelm No-No #1: Focus on what does not matter.
Pick one of those relatively minute and relatively unimportant details from any of your tasks and projects…
and then focus on it with laser intensity as if your entire business depended on getting it perfect.
Edit it. Re-edit it. Do it again, just for good measure. Nitpick it. Spend hours on this tiny, unimportant task.
Result? By the time you come up for air, you're still overwhelmed… and now you've got several hours less to use on work that does matter.
Overwhelm No-No #2: Buy (or Join) Another Magic Cure-All
It's just one more ebook, or video program, or audio course, or Facebook group, or mastermind…
But here's the Overwhelm Catch-22:
Unless you drop everything else to read / listen to / watch — and implement — that book or course right now…
It doesn't do a darn thing except get added to your to-do list.
You're already overwhelmed. What you need is a step forward; not another to-do.
Consumer Urge: 1, Productive Steps: 0.
Overwhelm No-No #3: “Fake” productive actions.
Click that video.
Then that article. Then that other video. Then that quiz. Then share it on Facebook. Then reply to something.
Then notice that other article that someone else just shared… and repeat.
Clicking, typing, reading, searching, and interacting online simulates many of the sounds and motions of productive action.
You literally lull yourself into feeling like you're doing something productive… without the pesky side effect of actually accomplishing anything.
Overwhelm No-No #4: Find an app for that.
Search for, evaluate, research, and ask your Facebook friends for their opinions on time management, to-do list, and productivity app.
Proceed to spend a few hours setting it up, tweaking the settings, playing with the notification options, seeing what social media integrations it has.
Generally fritter to the utmost degree.
Instead of, you know, doing any of the items you've now color-coded, tweaked, notified yourself about, and posted about on social media through your new app.
#Productivity!
Overwhelm No-No #5: Commit to just one more thing.
Yes, you should embrace opportunities. But not when you're in a state of overwhelm.
Think about it like this:
If your house is on fire, you wouldn't say “Yes” to an offer for a free kitchen remodeling session scheduled right at that moment.
Great opportunity, but you've got a fire to put out first.
Take the necessary steps to put out the fire…
then evaluate your opportunities when you're not looking at them through the haze of overwhelm.
The 5 Best Things To Do When You're Overwhelmed
Overwhelm Smart Move #1: Get perspective.
Step away from what you're doing for 10 minutes.
Literally step away and move your body.
Even if you just mosey into the next room or out onto your patio, stepping away gives your traffic jam of thoughts a chance to unclog and start moving again, rather than becoming totally gridlocked.
Grab a glass of water, stretch, maybe even walk around the block.
Use the 10 minutes to do the stuff you know you're supposed to do during your work day that none of us actually do often enough.
Overwhelm Smart Move #2: Find the smallest step forward.
Overwhelm loves BIG chunks of tasks.
One of the quickest ways out of overwhelm is to start finding the smallest possible step forward.
Ask yourself, “What is the single most important, valuable, or pressing task on my list?”
(Go with your first instinct.)
Then ask, “What is the one, smallest possible step I can take on that task right now?”
(Can you make it even smaller? π )
Then — and this is the important part — DO THAT STEP.
Once that small step is done, repeat the process. Do another single, smallest step.
Do this 5 times, or 30 minutes — whichever comes first.
Then get up and give yourself a 10 minute break. Repeat as needed.
You will be amazed at how much you actually accomplish with a series of “single, smallest possible steps”…
and how overwhelm just sort of vanishes when that's all you're concerned with.
Overwhelm Smart Move #3: Get focused.
The less focused you are, the less effective your work will be.
You know you're not working effectively, and you know you've SO MUCH to do, so you wind up feeling frustrated.
Guess what: The more frustrated you get, the less focused you get.
Vicious cycle!
When you're already in the midst of overwhelm, spending time doing ineffective work is like spinning your wheels in deep mud:
You only wind up more and more stuck.
The solution is to do as much as you can to remove distractions so you can get focused.
There's a list of suggestions for how to get focused fast here.
Overwhelm Smart Move #4: Let go of “done.”
“Done” is the tomorrow that never comes.
“Done” is a myth.
If “done” is your only goal, you're dooming yourself to perpetual overwhelm… because that to-do list? Is always gonna be there.
Instead of striving for one big “done,” aim for the completion of any one task on your list, no matter how tiny.
(Remember that “single, smallest step?”)
And after you finish one, aim for one more. And one more.
Accomplishing a series of small finishes is not only more doable than the unreachable “done”, it will also dissolve the feeling of overwhelm rather than heightening it.
Overwhelm Smart Move #5: Remember overwhelm is temporary.
Overwhelm often mimics panic, which means you feel like it's unbeatable — life or death.
Remember: It's not.
This is temporary. It is situational.
And YOU have control over whether your day is defined by it.
Image Credit: Rob Friesel | CC License
This may just be the addiction talking, but please allow me to make The Business Case for Bejeweled. Bejeweled is really good for me! Really! What better way to teach myself that “done” is a myth than to play a never-ending game, while letting my brain secretly process the answers to things when I’m not looking? I think I’m going to load up a new set of jewels right now.
Actually, yes–I think you’re right that Bejeweled can have a place in an overwhelm strategy. But I think the key difference is whether you’re using it essentially as a “step away” strategy (to let your brain unwind) or if you’re using it as an ostrich strategy (“as long I keep clicking these sparkly jewels, everything will magically be okay…”).
If you’re doing the former, you’re probably fine. But I think a lot of folks do the latter, and that’s where it gets the categorization of “Worst.”
And then there’s a third category of people: those who get compulsive about playing and simply cannot stop when the timer goes off & just have to play just one more game… and just one more… Um, ahem, not that I know anything about that. π
The worst thing to do when you feel overwhelmed is to retreat into your work cave and try to do battle with something on your list. This will only make you feel more helpless!
The best thing to do is reach out to people in your life and tell them that you are overwhelmed. You don’t have to ask for help; in fact, it’s easier and often more effective just to admit that you are swamped.
You’ll certainly learn quickly that everybody is swamped and you’re not alone. But you’ll also remember that the most important item on your list is your relationships—and these can never be “checked off” or completed on your own time without other people.
Share! It helps.
Good points, both about asking for help & about remembering to prioritize relationships. I do put some connection reminders on my to-do list, even though relationship building isn’t really a check-it-off thing, because I’ve found it really helps me to be mindful about keeping a place in my day reserved for reaching out & nurturing those relationships. Asking for help is a weak spot for me, and a friend of mine recently suggested putting “ask for help” on my list too, for that same reason, just to remain mindful about that possibility. It’s one I overlook too often… perhaps why it didn’t land on the list above! Thanks for the reminder on that (really important and useful) point.
But I love Bejeweled!
I would be the last person to tell you to drop a game you love… it’s more the when than the specific game. So if you dig those sparkly jewels, play away! (Just so long as it’s not delaying the inevitable coping with overwhelm, of course.) π
Nice post – lovely to discover your wit and wisdom Marissa!
What do I do when in overwhelm. S-l-0-w D-o-w-n.
It works every time.
I was talking with Thomas Sterner, author of The Practicing Mind, on last week’s radio show and he had a great example of why this works. He told a great story of how, as a concert piano tuner he has incredibly meticulous and tedious tuning to do… one day when running late and feeling very overwhelmed, he slowed everything to meticulous accomplishment of one movement at a time. I won’t repeat the whole story, but essentially he couldn’t believe his eyes when by the end he had actually saved 45 minutes off his time AND had gained energy and enthusiasm.
Worth doing, I’d say!
Love,
Elese
(that archive is free to listen to on my site if you like, it’s called Focus On Demand http://www.elesecoit.com/1/post/2011/01/focus-on-demand-with-tom-sterner.html)
You’re right. It’s not usually the intuitive response, but slowing down works. I’m not sure if it holds true for everyone else, but when I push myself and hurry, I wind up overlooking things, dropping things, messing things up somehow, which just makes me feel more pressured and more overwhelmed (and gives me more to do to clean up the messes). Hurrying rarely gives me any time advantage. But slowing down… makes space. Makes space for me to get perspective, to do things right, to not be overwhelmed.
It hadn’t occurred to me to put those two things together (overwhelm + hurrying vs. slowing down) but you’re absolutely right that slowing down is a great way to handle being overwhelmed!
What you said here is amazing, Elese. Re: ‘slowing down,’ with the story you told that makes it so clear what you mean: you might almost say it’s the secret to life, and you know I never say things like that.
Thank you!!!
I’ll go to that link right now. I think I’ll be listening to your other shows pretty soon, too.
Love the post Marissa, and Elise you’re right on. Rushing around just causes our brains to get even more muddled AND stresses out our body too. For me, the simple act of getting away from the desk and taking a few deep breaths works miracles. And like Marissa said, getting outdoors -looking at the wide world of beauty lifts my perspective up past my “boxed in” thinking.
I have one more best and worst thing to do. Don’t have another cup of coffee thinking that it will make you more productive. Chances are the caffeine will make you more anxious and more likely to feel more overwhelmed. Trust me, I know this one from experience.
One more thing you might want to try…and this is easier said than done…take a deep breath and focus on your breathing. I know this isn’t easy, especially when you’re feeling busy. But it kind of goes with step away for 10 minutes.
Marissa, some really great thoughts here on a very important subject.
LOL @ the coffee–because, yep, been there too. (For me it was Red Bulls in college. When it was actually time for me to do something productive, I’d go for caffeine first. Which, of course, just made me jittery and scattered. Not that it stopped me from going right back for more caffeine as soon as the first one wore off.) π
And breath! Yes! So simple, and so easy to completely overlook. That’s an important “and” to the step away suggestion–because if we step away and just go panic, clench up and stress out for 10 minutes, that’ll get us nowhere at all. But if we step away and remember to breathe, then we’re getting somewhere.
Your idea also goes well with Sparky Firepants’ note in a recent comment about reconnecting with where you are physically and what’s happening around you. Pair that with stepping away & remember to notice the breath, and it’s a great recipe for calm, steady readiness. Way preferable to clenched up overwhelm. Good points, as always, Tim!
Love ALL your points (and making a note not to discover what Bejeweled is…).
I’d add, sometimes it needs more than just ten minutes. I know that can feel like it might make the overwhelm worse. But I can’t say enough about the value of getting the blood flowing. 45 minutes on my bike can bring such an amazing cascade of ideas, inspiration, new perspectives – even entire newsletter articles.
And, uh, yeah, I’ve learned to take paper, pens, and a little digital recorder so I can capture all those ideas. π
So true, Grace. There are times–and this is kind of in line with Robby’s point above about not continuing to fight the overwhelm–when it’s even necessary to call it a day and just come back to it all tomorrow. Sometimes 10 minutes just isn’t long enough for that thought / panic traffic jam to clear out.
I have a 2-hour block in the middle of my day that’s reserved for my workout, yoga and meditation. That’s a BIG chunk of time, but it’s also a total sanity saver. And by the time I hit the shower afterwards, I’m often bubbling with ideas & renewed clarity rather than feeling clogged with overwhelm.
You’re smart to take along tools on your bike ride for idea capturing. I have AquaNotes on my Amazon wishlist for mid-shower idea capturing! (Which is a good point too: it’s not a bad idea to take a notepad with you when you step away, even if you think you couldn’t possibly need it because you’re overwhelmed, because I think it’s exactly when we give ourselves some space from our overwhelm that we often get a sudden flash of insight, idea or clarity.)
Another reason you’re smart: staying away from Bejeweled! LOL It’s so much easier to stay away than to quit! π
Thanks, Marissa.
If you have a tiled shower, you don’t need anything fancier than a washable marker. Write on the shower walls, and away you go.
π
Worst thing for me to do when I’m overwhelmed is try to figure anything else out. The longer I keep myself in the conversation of HOW something is going to get done, or how to fit it all in, how to make myself calm down…it just gets worse and worse.
So continuing to THINK is not a good look for me when I’m already overwhelmed.
The best thing for me when I’m overwhelmed is SLEEP.
If I am well-rested and have been taking care of my body like that, it’s not even possible for me to get overwhelmed. I find that I only get overwhelmed when I’m sleep deprived in some way. So that’s priority #1 if I get overwhelmed. It means I need more sleep.
It wasn’t always this way though. I used to get overwhelmed WAY more often because I just didn’t feel safe in my life. But I finally put some very focused attention on safety in my life, and attention on feeling good…and over a few months I was able to upgrade my experience to the point where now overwhelm is only something I experience if I get very little sleep.
Lack of Sleep is my gateway to overwhelm.
And on the flip side, Adequate Sleep is my gateway to loving my life and feeling great about everything.
I think Arianna Huffington has a TED talk on the benefits of sleep.
* a bit of holding music*
Yep, found it: here it is
Type A, sleep deprived?
http://www.ted.com/talks/arianna_huffington_how_to_succeed_get_more_sleep.html
Love,
Elese
I’m so much more prone to overwhelm when I’ve not had enough sleep. I never appreciated how much sleep mattered to my overall wellbeing until I started getting enough (after leaving the academic & corporate worlds). Now when I don’t get enough sleep, everything else is off-kilter. I’m a total evangelist for adequate sleep!
This is another great tie-in to overwhelm that didn’t occur to me. Lack of sleep is such a biggie.
Mondo smarts, Marissa.
And, oy, how many times have I fallen into one of the five worsts you listed? I swear I spent a year searching for the perfect to-do list software. Because, you know, that had to be the fix.
For me, the worst thing I can do is keep pushing. When I’m spinning my wheels, pressing the gas never makes anything better. Ever. And I’m actually really happy to say I’ve learned that lesson enough that I almost never keep my foot on the pedal now.
My best has to be drumming. Giving myself a ten minute drum break can make more difference than giving myself a week off. Getting up, walking out of my office and snagging a drum changes things totally for me.
I used to feel like that was slacking. But it’s totally not. Because I get more done after a drum break than I would have if I’d just stayed glued to my seat mindlessly clicking refresh on Facebook.
Listening to your music = another GREAT way of handling overwhelm. Your sound mojo does for my brain what stepping away & breathing do for my body & mood. I can only imagine how much it must help you to actually be the one making the sound mojo!
And you’re right: it is totally not slacking. Giving ourselves the space to reinvigorate and clear the cobwebs is as vital as any other forward action. Absolutely. (Or absosmurfly, one might say.) π
The only problem with no-no #1 is knowing that you’re doing it. I figured out that I can focus on details too much but only indirectly.