Email, for many of us, has reached a point where it feels burdensome and out of control on more days than not. Some folks are ditching email entirely–an impulse I can't claim is unfamiliar, though that's probably not a realistic possibility for many of us.
I'm not alone. Leo declared independence from email. Gwen described migrating off of email. Havi said her biggest regret about going on email sabbatical was not doing it sooner.
Reaching the “breaking point” in your relationship with your email inbox is, for a growing number of digital denziens, a rite of passage. Some, like Leo, leave email behind. Others, like Havi, outsource the email handling. And others, like Gwen, are redefining and restructuring their use of and dependence on email.
The two reasons email has become ineffective (and how checking it once a day addresses them)
1. Email is too reflexive.
It has become, unfortunately, way too easy to hit “compose” or “reply.”
The very instant a query comes to mind, some folks fire off an email, rather than pausing to consider where else they might find the information they're seeking
The “Compose/Reply” buttons have superseded our own impetus to pay attention, and at a certain point, it becomes disrespectful to the person you're emailing. It says, “My time is too important to be bothered reading/checking my info/etc., but your time is far less valuable, so you do it instead.”
A client once received an email from someone asking us to provide them with the phone number for a teleseminar. The number was contained in the email to which they were responding. But they explained, and I quote: “I'm sure the info is here, but it's easier to email you and have you tell me than to read the email! lol”
Checking email once a day addresses this because…
…it builds in a time-delay between the email and the response that helps eliminate the perception that it's faster or easier for the recipient to read/look at/process something than it is for the sender to do so.
If you know that your email won't be received and processed for 12+ hours, it forces you to stop and think, “Do I want to figure this out myself and have the information sooner, or do I want to send the email and wait for the reply?” It's no longer always easier to hit compose than it is to read your own email or make use of your own resources.
2. Email is too stressful & panic-ridden.
For better or worse, email (and voice mail, to some degree) bring out the Big Red Panic Button Pusher in many of us. Because the technology is so instantaneous, we want the response to be just as immediate. And somewhere along the line, we forgot that wanting immediate responses isn't the same thing as needing them.
So when a sender sends an email, and in under 24 hours starts sending follow-up emails asking if the prior emails were received (and if they've been received, when were they received? and where are they in your queue? and how long 'til you do what's asked in the email? and… etc. etc. etc.) it becomes a recipe I like to call “Insanity with a twist of agonized screaming.”
That which can be responded to immediately does not equate to that which should be or needs to be responded to immediately. In our logic brains, most of us know that. In the part of our brains that controls email usage, all we see is the Bright Red Panic Button that starts flashing as soon as we hit “send” and doesn't quiet down until we get a response… at which point we hit “Reply” and then start the whole panic sequence all over again.
Checking email once a day addresses this because…
…it sets the proper expectations. And expectations matter.
Just as someone wouldn't start panicking a few hours after mailing a letter because they know that the mail doesn't arrive in that span of time, hopefully the tendency to panic about email will be quelled because the sender will know that I don't respond to email in that span of time.
No matter how available you make myself via email or how fast your average response time is, there will be pressure to be more available and to respond even faster. At some point, it becomes necessary to take control of the expectations and set them yourself, rather than continually trying to meet the expectations others are setting for you.
Your turn!
Do you find yourself dealing with overly reflexive emails or panicky senders? Do you find yourself sending overly reflexive emails or being the panicky sender? What are your strategies for coping with these two problems (whether as the sender or recipient)?
Oh, this is so thoughtful and helpful. I’ve been thinking a bunch lately about my own relationship with e-mail. And I so relate to that big red panicky button and feeling anxious in my inbox a lot of the time. Part of my (somewhat unrelated) stuff is around getting hooked on checking for the random and occasional good e-mail morsels, and needing to work through some of that so that I can put some of your suggestions to use.
.-= Briana´s last blog ..I’m the little girl. Who saw it coming? =-.
It’s so easy to get hooked on looking for those good email morsels, isn’t it? I completely relate to that.
I didn’t really start making big shifts in how I thought about and handled email until I finally realized just how much of a toll it was taking on my ability to work effectively–and even on my ability to enjoy those good morsels! I’d never suggest that checking email in a certain way is universally bad or universally good–and I’m realistic about the fact that I’m going to have days where I slip into old habits of checking too often. It happens!
I think the most important thing is that when you stop and look at your relationship to email, you’re okay with it. That’s all that really matters. And if checking for good email morsels is part of your relationship to email that works for you, by all means, keep it! It’s the anxiety-producing side of things that I’m eager to eliminate (or, more realistically, minimize and manage).
Whatever you decide to do, make email work for you, and not vice versa. That’s the key! (And come back and share how you’re doing it, if you’re so inclined!)
This is food for thought! I really don’t need to Step Away from The E-mail, since I don’t get very much of it. I don’t consider e-mail as the fastest communication tool – though it is faster than snail mail – and don’t treat it as such. If I am in panick-mode, the best way to solve that is to pick up the phone or drop by to get my problem solved. Or at least to get rid of the panick. Therefore, I do not send panicky e-mail.
I hardly ever receive panicky e-mail, which is best because it would make me ignore the e-mail rather than respond. I detest panicky e-mail with a received/read notice thingy attached and I will always click ‘don’t send notice’. Note: I don’t do that when it is attached just to know that I received documents in good order. In my mailbox, I don’t see the importance level set by the sender. I will decide what’s important to me.
On top of all that, my mailbox is not open by default and I don’t see any notifications of new e-mail (disabled that). So I probably trained people to know that I don’t respond post-haste to solve their problems by e-mail. Therefore, they won’t even ask. The only requests for help I receive are things people really need my specific help with and they agree with whatever time I need to do it for them.
I might need to come back at this by next year, though, because by then I might be drowning in business e-mail – as opposed to academic e-mail right now.
It sounds like you’ve gotten some solid email habits in place to keep email from running your life. Smart, you are!
I think there is always a change when you go from academic to business setting (and when you go from one business setting to another, for that matter). There will be some tweaks to make and new issues to manage. But the fact that you’ve already figured out some ways of keeping the email beast under control is excellent–you’ll be able to use that framework, even while you make the necessary tweaks and adjustments.
Plus, you’re used to the idea that you decide how email fits into your life, rather than thinking you have to mold your life to fit your email. That alone is an invaluable realization that will continue to serve you well!
This is so thought provoking, Marissa. I’m going to have to think about how I can implement this in my work life! I spend way too much time answering emails. Most don’t need to be answered right away. If I could pare it down to once (maybe twice?) a day, it would free up a tremendous amount of time.
Outside of the contact page on this site, did you inform your current clients of the change any other way? And does this mean you keep Twitter open all day for true emergencies? (Those actually happen in my business, and right now I find out about them via email).
Thanks for this great idea. I’m glad I found your site, and I’ll be back to read future posts: this is good stuff!
.-= Pamela Wilson´s last blog ..Design 101 | Storyselling for Fun and Profit =-.
Hi Pamela! Thanks for reading!
The blog post is actually the outward discussion of a process that has been happening bit-by-bit behind the scenes here at Can-Do-Ology Headquarters. I work out communication expectations and practices with each client individually as we start working together (with tweaks and adjustments as we progress)–and the truth is that what appears on the blog as my “new” policy and practice is actually how things have been happening for some time now. I’m just making it public and official, and discussing the whys and hows of it.
I do keep Twitter open all day. I use Tweetdeck, and I have my notification settings such that I only receive pop-up notices when I get an @ message or a DM. I keep Tweetdeck minimized in my dock, so I don’t ever see the full Twitter stream (and its potential distractions!) unless I maximize the program, and I don’t do unless I’m wanting to converse and interact for a while. If I get a message that needs a response, I’ll open Twitter in a web browser tab to do so, and then close that tab when I’m done. (I’ve actually got a separate post on emergencies that will be published on Wednesday too.)
(New reader here)
I have found that once I went to Facebook – my email issues have all but depleted. My ISP has their email on a secure server through Google who has fantastic spam filters.. and I created tons of filters and folders to sort incoming mail so it’s manageable – but everyone in my life now knows – to get my attention go to my fB or text me. I love it. It’s so freeing than how things used to be for me!
.-= Melanie Morales´s last blog ..Interal Shifts – Admitting Successes & Dreams Realized =-.
That’s awesome, Melanie. And I like that you’ve found a way to make Facebook a useful communication tool–I think it still tends to get dismissed as “just for fun” in a lot of ways. But the fact that it’s become a primary means of getting your attention and that you’re using it and texts instead of relying solely on email is a great example of how much the way we interact with applications can change how we perceive them. I’m really glad you shared that!
I’m always intrigued by the idea of shedding e-mail or even scheduling e-mail time like you suggest.
I have a pretty good e-mail handling system (similar to Charlie Gilkey’s E-mail Triage), but I find that I can get “stuck” and become less productive when I see that little red number in my dock (Mac).
I’ve tried closing e-mail and checking it only once a day, but I’ve come across two issues, particular to my field (design):
1. Clients want to send me descriptions of what they want or even reference files. It’s just so easy to keep them organized that way; I’ve got dates, reference subjects, and text that accompanies any visuals, all right there. However, to use them while I work I need to have Mail open. Hmmm.
2. I frequently need to send clients proof or written concepts throughout the day. E-mail is easy.
Visual and written communication for me and my clients is a HUGE part of how we work together.
So I’m wondering if there exists a cloud app for handling these situations? Google docs? Anything else?
Any suggestions would be awesome.
.-= Sparky Firepants´s last undefined ..If you register your site for free at =-.
I think a key point is that email isn’t “the bad guy.” It’s a communication tool. The difficulties arise when we sort of lose control over how we use it, and start feeling (and acting) beholden to email, or expecting others to feel and act that way.
I too work out of my email, because there’s just no effective way of moving all of the info from clients to some other source. But what I’m not doing is processing the email as it arrives–I’m batching the processing and doing that once a day.
I use Gmail’s labels and filters to create work areas (each client has their own folder), and after I process my new email, I work out of each client’s folder, rather than working out of the main inbox. It takes some habit readjustment to not yield to the siren call of the “new email” number, I admit. But for me, knowing that I cannot stop working out of my email account, it’s a habit change I’m willing to make.
For exchanging information in the cloud, I’m really partial to 37Signals suite of offerings–I love Backpack and Basecamp (http://37signals.com/). I’ve tried several collaboration platforms, but I keep coming back to those two as my tried-and-true favorites.
But there are other possibilities, depending on the layout and features you’re wanting: Central Desktop (http://www.centraldesktop.com/), Taskbarn (http://www.taskbarn.com/), Huddle (http://www.huddle.net/) and ActiveCollab (http://www.activecollab.com/) are a few, in addition to Google Docs as you mentioned.
The bottom line, I think, is to find a means of managing the communication and collaboration tools I use, rather than letting them manage me, and making the necessary adjustments to my own schedule and expectations–and to others’ expectations of me–to allow that to occur. (And realizing that what works today might need tweaking a month from now… constant balance checks are vital!)
As a designer, I deal with the same issues with email. And it was these two things (and a smattering of other things) that broke my “email once a day” plan from early 2009.
I was able to eliminate #1 by changing my workflow. For me, emails that haven’t been filed away (i.e. into the place where I only need them for occasional reference, in the distant future) stress me out. I used to use Gmail labels to organize by client, and I think that has a lot of potential for some people. But for me, it wasn’t really effective in relieving my tension level. These days, when I receive an email from a client, one of three things happens:
1. It’s a question or comment or something that needs a reply. It stays in my inbox until I respond. (My inbox only has things that need my attention. Everything else is archived.) If it’s a small task that needs attending to, I’ll often write it on my to-do list and then archive the email, just so it isn’t staring at me like. Hi! I need your attention! No, you’re on my list.
2. It’s an attachment for a client project — maybe it’s artwork or copy or goodness knows what else. I save the documents to that client’s folder on my hard drive, confirm receipt of said items (if necessary) and archive the email.
3. It’s notes, dates, etc. for a client project. For awhile, I used Backpack to keep track of this information. Now I (are you ready for this?) write it down. On paper. In a notebook. I label my pages by subject or client, and that page has all the relevant info for the project. They send a list of adjectives that describe what they’re looking for? I transcribe it, with my own commentary. We establish a timeline? I write it down. For me, having all of those bits and pieces in 328 different emails is crazy-making; it ignites my OCD or DTO or something, and I feel scattered because the information is scattered. Having it all on one page creates a quick reference. And writing it down helps me remember, so I actually refer to that page much less than I referred to my email or Backpack.
As for sending proofs and concepts to clients, email is the easiest and best, and this keeps me in my inbox much more than it should. But one thing I’ve tried is composing emails throughout the day (as I prepare materials) and then mass-sending them all when I stop working for the day. This prevents the stream-of-consciousness emails that we all hate (oh, sorry, one more thing! just kidding, another thing… okay, this is my third follow-up email, oops!) and it helps set those boundaries that Marissa so wisely recommends. Maybe I need to try this technique again… 🙂
.-= Allie´s last blog ..2010 reading plan =-.
Marissa,
This whole system warms my teacher heart! Even I get those messages from people requesting information that could be found if they just spent a minute looking for it. Grrr…
This whole “my time is clearly more important than yours” bs brings up all sorts of icky from my last career (in politics) and so I set a lot of limits with people about time in my new career.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for setting limits with your people. Maybe this lesson will teach them that they can be more resourceful and take care of their own needs.
I think what you wrote works if your business isn’t depended on the use of email communication. I don’t get many emails from friends and family so when I get a personal email, I do want to respond sooner and not wait an entire day. For business, not checking my email often would make me less productive, especially if I already have a difficult time getting in contact with someone (via email or phone).
You’re right and fantastic and I spend far too much time click-click-clicking and glancing up to see if I have mail yet. I did it while writing that last sentence!
Thus, I will restrict myself to twice a day. And then once I’m sure the world is not actually falling, I’ll try once a day.
Thanks Marissa. I’ve just found you and I love you intensely already.
Catherine
.-= Catherine Caine´s last blog ..An Open Question: Where’s Your Tech Pain? =-.
The thing is, if I ditch e-mail, I have to spend more time on the phone. And the phone can really suck me in. I feel like I can protect my time boundaries better with email. Am I nuts?