Suppose Snow White's produce-induced slumber lasted long enough to bring her from little-cottage-in-the-forest to profile-in-the-social-media-expanse. Accustomed as she is to identifying her companions by their most easily-recognizable traits, what floppy-hatted friends she might encounter in today's online landscape?
1. Bizzy
Bizzy's Tweets are usually about how much he has going on, and how he's terribly overwhelmed by it all. He rarely talks about the fruits of his busy-ness, though, largely because the only thing all of his blustering about being busy seems to produce is… more blustering about being busy.
Known for: Having the most jam-packed days and anxiety-ridden sleepless nights, but never actually getting much accomplished.
Strength: Always on the move.
Weakness: Never getting anywhere.
2. Dizzy
Dizzy knows only enough about social media to be completely bamboozled. Apt to purchase every “How To” seminar, e-book and teleclass on the market. Dizzy doesn't necessarily lack in smarts, but in focus and willingness to stick to one thing long enough to get a solid footing. He becomes the Tazmanian Devil of social media: spinning around in so many directions at the same time that he essentially creates nothing more than havoc.
Known for: Being a goldmine for how-to authors.
Strength: Rampant eagerness to “get it.”
Weakness: Appetite for “getting it” totally overwhelms actual ability to figure anything out.
3. Snarky
Snarky can find the humor–or at least the razor's edge between wit and bad taste–in any situation. Views social media as a stage, and the world, his stand-up routine's audience. Likely died a little inside when Favrd went away.
Known for: Having “LOL” and “Too soon!” show up largely in his Tweetcloud.
Strength: Easily ReTweetable; says what the rest of us chuckle at but wouldn't actually say in our own status updates.
Weakness: Great garnish to other content, but difficult to be a main course of snark alone.
4. Cloney
When in doubt, be someone else. Cloney finds the best parts of everyone else's identity, and parrots them. When writing his social media profiles, his main source of information is someone else's profile. His about page sounds eerily like… your about page. What you Tweet about, so too does Cloney Tweet about, often without changing the wording much.
Known for: Mining your friends/followers list.
Strength: Highly advanced mimicry.
Weakness: No perceptible personality of his own.
5. Needy
The air of desperation is Needy's oxygen tank. He longs to be in the Inner Circle, and is perpetually convinced that he isn't (and that everyone else is). He will buy your product, RT your musings, become your Facebook Fan and join your membership site, all in an unbridled quest for acceptance. Prolific in forum posts and long email missives, Needy is fundamentally unable to function without someone else telling him how to do so and reassuring him that he's liked.
Known for: Filling up your email inbox (or Tweetstream, or Facebook wall) with pleas for attention. “Meaning well.”
Strength: Persistent. Very, very persistent.
Weakness: Tendency to drive his targets of attention completely batshit crazy.
6. Boastful
Whatever you can do, Boastful can do better–and has. Boastful is great at letting the social media world know about his accomplishments. Of course, being the Most Awesome At Everything leaves little time to be concerned about anyone else; fortunately, Boastful is the Very Best at completely disregarding everyone around him. And isn't afraid to say so. Considers it a personal interaction when he ReTweets someone's compliment of him.
Known for: Proudly declaring that he does not follow anyone on Twitter, does not respond to anyone's email, and cannot be bothered with your interview requests, all because he's just too busy Being Awesome.
Strength: Letting others know about his strengths.
Weakness: Stark lack of meaningful interaction with others, including those hungrily following Boastful's advice on How To Be As Awesome As Me.
7. Sunny
From The Secret to the Have A Nice Day bumper sticker, Sunny's world is nothing if not optimistic. Having never encountered a silver lining he didn't love profusely, Sunny is the first to tell you how great life is–all. the. time.
Known for: Chirping merrily about… everything. Constantly.
Strength: Always sees the bright side.
Weakness: Obliviously unaware that there is a downside or weakness to anything, and sure to chirp merrily at you, should you choose to acknowledge or react to one.
Do you know these dwarves?
Which of these dwarves have you encountered in your social (media) circle? Which ones did I miss?
Oh my goodness… this is a classic! And, interestingly enough, I think can be applied to life in general, not just life in the social media world! You’re brilliant!
.-= Lynne´s last blog ..i love seth godin… and now i do even more =-.
Thanks, Lynne! I agree–I think the personalities are definitely visible in our offline social circles as well as online. And the same person is often a different “dwarf” online than offline, I think. Hmmm… ponderable!
Hee. Haven’t been on Twitter long enough to see all of these, though I see them all on Facebook. 🙂
I have been (and still am at times) Needy, though I think I hide it well. And I am very often Sunny, though (for which I thank Havi and her posts) I have realized that trying to help others look on the bright side is not always useful (and can be hurtful) to them in their pain and am working on it. And I miss the days when I was Snarky – well before social media.
.-= elizabeth´s last blog ..catching the light =-.
Oh absolutely–Facebook, membership sites, forums, you name it. The dwarves are definitely not Twitter-specific! And I think that we’ve all got a bit of each dwarf in our personalities… some just have a whole lot more than others. (A whole lot more.) 😉
I agree, definitely a brilliant and original post. and I must say, I see a little of me in most, if not all of these, at one point or another.
Beautiful. Oh, and Heigh Ho, heigh ho… it’s off to tweet I go…
.-= Gina´s last blog ..When Worlds Collide =-.
Thanks, Gina! And you’re so right… depending on what day you ask and what’s going on, we’d all be able to identify a bit with each of these personalities. (Just hopefully not for too long or too prominently!)
Great post. Just wanted to mention there may be an 8th dwarf. His name would be Lurky. You never hear of him or see him because he’s always hiding in the underbrush watching the other dwarves. I can see him because he often is me. (ouch).
Oh, was that you rustling the underbrush near my favorite hidden Lurky spot? 😉 I’ve been a Lurky many, many times in the past (and will be again many times down the road), especially if I’m new to the blog/site/forum. There are a lot of cool folks in that underbrush, I do believe.
Interesting post. Good Read. Beware the dwarves!
They can pop up anywhere. Sometimes at my keyboard.
Thanks, MrMonge! And I think there’s a market for a line of “Beware the Dwarves” apparel and accessories… I, for one, now want that on a t-shirt.
This is great. Here are a few from me. 🙂
8. Useless – tweets about blah, blah
Known for: tweets about blah, blah
Strength: um
Weakness: tweets about blah, blah
9. I’m too sexy for my shirt
Known for: loves talking about him or her self because they are so special
Strength: well, how g8 they are of course
Weakness: mirror, mirror on the wall…
10. Nasty
Known for: Writing trashy tweets & things purely for shock value
Strength: hmm
Weakness: Rude, annoying, pointless, self-absorbed
.-= Deborah Mourey´s last blog ..Ok, Now That’s Funny (Did You Really Say That During an Interview?) =-.
Ha! Love it. Of course, #9 has succeeded in getting Right Said Fred’s anthemic ode to unrepentant vanity stuck in my head. “I’m a model, you know what I mean, and I do my little turn on the catwalk…” Earworm!
What a wonderful, and timeless blog entry, thank you Marissa. We’ll tweet the hell out of this on twitter from the @OfficeDivvy twitter account
Thanks very much for this entertaining and useful information. :))
Ky Ekinci
Co-Founder
Office Divvy
It completely makes my evening to know that someone’s tweeting the hell out of any of my posts. I appreciate the comment & the tweet! Thanks, Ky!
Wow! A lot of #5 and #6 in a many of us bloggers! (Blushes)
Superb observation, Marissa!
Source Blogger (Verified)
“Determined to make you a better blogger”
.-= Source Blogger ´s last blog ..How I Doubled My Subscribers and Blog Income In 1 Hour?! =-.
Well, you know, admitting it is the first step… 😉 Thanks for the kudos!
Lurky is definitely the missing dwarf!
.-= Tami´s last blog ..Book(s) #best09 =-.
Forget which dwarves I’ve seen on Twitter. I’m sitting hear laughing over, sweating, and regretting which ones I’ve *been*! 🙂
Fun post. Great warnings. Big thanks.
.-= Crystal´s last blog ..Product Funnels, Pricing, and other gifts from the Lift Off Retreat =-.