Federal Judge Quotes Billy Madison

In a recent federal court order, U.S. Bankruptcy Judge Leif M. Clark denied Defendant’s motion for “incomprehensibility.”

Adding hilarious insult to the denial, Judge Clark, in what is probably the greatest footnote ever, cited the Adam Sandler flick Billy Madison as he slammed the Defendant’s pathetic attempt at legal maneuvering.

Judge Clark wrote, in denying Defendant’s motion, that:

[t]he court cannot determine the substance, if any, of the Defendant’s legal argument, nor can the court even ascertain the relief the Defendant is requesting. The Defendant’s motion is accordingly denied for being incomprehensible.

The Judge then footnoted the following:

Or, in the words of the competition judge to Adam Sandler’s title character in the movie, “Billy Madison,” after Billy Madison had responded to a question with an answer that sounded superficially reasonable but lacked any substance,

Mr. Madison, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I’ve ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response was there anything that could even be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

The Judge concluded his Order and his footnote with the following slam heard ’round the chamber:

Deciphering motions like the one presented here wastes valuable chamber staff time, and invites this sort of footnote.

I wonder if that judge is looking for a clerk… I have a feeling that any judge who finds it appropriate to quote pop culture references in Orders is a judge that could appreciate my sense of humor.

(sources: You Can’t Arrested For Being Awesome, Negligent Use of a Dangerous Mind)
(to view .pdf file of the original judicial Opinion, click here)

Labels: humor, lawyer stuff, neat-o